i dun give it a damn!

i really dunno what to do now,
yes you guys keep asking me to think.
think abt what?!
I'll be sorry to him if i quit but if i stay i'll disappoint you guys even more and in the end, also quit
its just a sooner or later thing.
im just not as good as you think i am
you all think too highly of me and in the end,
you'll see how useless i am and there's nothing i can contirbute to the company and you get disappointed

yes. you want me to be mature and grow up but i cant keep up with you!
i cant breathe normally with you around me
and im just a fucking 18 year old girl!
what else you want me to do?!
i have to fucking support my family and study and even work
i think i have really tried my best to live well

this is the first time im getting so low for exams.
i dint only failed but i fucking hell failed badly.
30/100 sounds good?!
i think im the fucking last one in class
this is the first time im going through all these okay?!
if this is what you want to see to prove my commitment level for work then CONGRATS!

you want me the take initiative for the whole world's thing
eh, i dun have the whole world's courage to do that.
i really dunno to what extent do you want me to continue stressing myself...

everyone knows how much i loved this job
yes LOVED!
i dunno abt now...
i used to loved it so much till i got addicted to it
you too agreed to that
CAMP ADDICT
sounds great but now i feel that it's a burden to do camps, to face you guys
can anyone imagine something that you used to enjoy so much have now become your burden?
anyone knows the feeling?
all i know is i dread going to work
everytime i go in the atmosphere that i felt is i-dun-belong-here atmosphere

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!
you always ask me this question.
and now when i ask this, i cant get the answer anywhere.
yes, i can continue working thick skin-ly.
but the fact is you guys fucking hell dun need me!

you always say when im good im damn fucking good
but when im screwed im fucked up
I AGREE!
and now is my fucked up period and i fucking hell got no idea how to make myself better

and you get angry whenever i put myself down
have you ever wondered why?
cause i fucking hell got put down fucking lots of time till i got tired of it
so i would rather i do the job of putting myself down
less painful too...

No one knows what i've gone through and i dun expect anyone to understand me
but quit saying'never push me to the extreme' when im feeling fucking helpless at that point
it makes me feel even more fucked up
the reason why i dint tell you these straight to the face cause i know you'll be even more angry
and i dunno how to talk to you adults objectively

yes you can i dun have the courage to say all these
i dun deny that
you can say im a fucking loser
I DUN DENY THAT TOO...